God: "Thou Shalt Not Kill!"
Christian: "God, the enemy is trying to kill me!"
God: "Kill them, kill their livestock, dash the little ones' heads upon the rocks but save all the women who have not known a man for yourselves."
Christian: "Umm, but I'm not supposed to kill..."
God: "kill, Kill, KILL!"
Christian: "But, the Commandment...!"
God: "KKKIIIIILLLLLLLLL!"
Christian: "But God, you are so great and powerful, why not just make them disappear?"
God:
Christian: "God?"
God:
Christian: "God? Are you there? If I kill them, I break a Commandment, why don't you just do it?"
God:
God:
God:
...
Christian (with sword through his stomach): "GODAMNIT!"
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
How To Follow The Commandments - Part 1
Let's start with the most popular Commandment of all:
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1 comment:
Note that there are different translations of this commandments. Specifically, in Jewish and (most modern) Protestant Decalogues it's listed as a more specific "thou shalt not murder" rather than the more encompassing "thou shalt not kill" used, for example, by Roman Catholics.
The "not murder" commandment wouldn't really address killing in self-defense, war, etc. (including, I suppose, offing someone who pisses The Lord off.) The "not kill" does pose a conflict with all the killing God commands in the Bible and, really, leaves Him little wriggle room.
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